Ambitious, but rubbish

Battlestar Galactica, yo

Feuer Frei!


Space Quest something!

Back in __ minutes

All the memories are too few


Japanese crows proven more intelligent than average dane

Godzilla plays Super Mario level 1-1

Real-life teleportation invented in Ja..., wait... Denmark?

Photoset: Zombie and pirate rights march

Catchy something something... in Space!

Mine? Mate? Mike?

by Justas (21 March 2004)

Anybody who has seen one of Pixar's latest masterpieces, "Finding Nemo", will certainly remember those yelling seagulls for the rest of their life. However, it has also stirred up great controversy. Some people think that the seagulls are yelling "Mine! Mine! Mine!", while others think it's "Mate! Mate! Mate!". There's also a third group of people, apparently slightly smaller than the first two, who claim the line to be "Mike! Mike! Mike!". I decided to google up some sites regarding this particularly delicate matter and found out that the so-called "truth" may be more difficult to find than one might think. Especially if you look at how long the discussion has gone in here without any answer being found.

The source of the mystery
Now, of course, most people come to the conclusion that the easiest way would be just to watch the DVD's subtitles. However, could you be entirely sure that it has been translated identically to all the languages? What if it says "Mine" in one language and "Mate" in another? Of course, you could check all the languages on the DVD. But what if there are alternate versions? You couldn't even trust an authentic movie script provided by Pixar, since they could have released several different ones. In fact, I'll bet it's all part of a major conspiracy to split the future mankind into three major religious divisions that will be at war with each other: The Mineans, The Mateans and The Mikeans.

The Mineans would most likely be the faction with capitalist views with their holy word, "Mine!" indicating the wish to obtain as much as possible and keep it to yourself, as opposed to the Mateans. The Australian term, "Mate!", meaning "Friend", would form socialistic and communist views among their followers, by putting more emphasis on friendship, which would lead to helping and sharing with each other. The Mikeans, however, would remain a mystery to the other two - "Mike? Why on Earth would the birds say that?". Being the outnumbered ones, whose way of living isn't approved by the leading two sects, they could be associated with Muslims. Despite their continuous attempts of self-defense through "terrorism", they would still be condemned and eventually eliminated from the Earth, leaving it with only the Mineans and Mateans.

However, there is one man who knows the real answer. Andrew Stanton, the author of the movie's script. In his hands is the power to stop it all, before any of this can happen. On the other hand, if the aforementioned events were to take place, he and his successors might soon achieve the status of a dynasty of Messiahs. One of them would one day reveal The Truth to the lowly Earthlings, therefore weakening the morale of The Wrong Division and, after centuries of war and hatred, allow The Right Ones to rule the Earth in eternal peace. Not to mention that all this started with white birds. Coincidence? Didn't think so.

Of course, he could also say that the Mikeans were right, in which case I'd pay 50 bucks just to see the look on their faces. Heh heh.